Life and the Art of Making Peanut Butter Cookies

Many women say that having children has put a damper on their creativity. Luckily, this hasn't been the case with me. If anything, being a mother has torn down some inner blocks within myself letting me be more free and, dare I say it, action orientated. Since Lilly was born I've made a lot of new collages and jewellry, always humming and singing while I work. A sure sign, my husband says, that I am happy. Yesterday was an interesting case and point. It was a Sunday of a not so easy weekend. My husband worked long hours the week before and I was looking forward to some family time together as well as a break from the babies (or at least shared time). Reality, family style, reared its ugly head when my husband woke up on Saturday with a nasty cold and had to spend all day in bed. Still, I had a pretty ok day, made a new 50s nude ladies collage and worked on some ideas for new necklace designs. Sunday my husband was feeling a bit better but still laid down for most of the morning. I was hanging out with my babies, grooving as we do, but I was at a loss for what to work on. Not in the mood for art or crafting, not in the mood to read, the babies are doing their own thing. And then I was struck with inspiration, a let's-bake-cookies-eureka from the sky. Of course, they had to be peanut butter, a type of cookie that doesn't even exist in Germany except at Barcomi's, a cafe run by a native New Yorker. I used creamy peanut butter and listened to NPR, the babies sitting beside me. Mia and I ate lots of cookie dough and I'm sure my milk had a tinge of peanut buttery goodness for Lilly later. They were delcious!

California

It feels good to be back in California. I've been here since Thursday and each morning after the intial fog has blown off I'm outside, sitting in the sun, like a lizard on a rock. I've been so deprived of sunshine these past Berlin Winter months and now I just can't get enough. The trip is also bitter sweet: my father is very ill with cancer and, since I live a half a world away, this will probably be the last time I will see him alive. So here I am, in a place so aptly called the sunshine state, the warmth of the rays on the skin not always enough to warm my heart....It's great to spend time with my family though and to have baby Mia hang out with them. I swear she now loves my mom more than she loves me! My second child will be here in October and it's so good to know that he/she will have two families, one in the Bay Area and one in Berlin, as baby Mia does. But sad that he/she will never get to know her grandfather. Both of my husband's parents are dead, so this means my children will only have my mom as their single grandparent. But she's great so they have lucked out. Anyway, this entry is a bit personal for this blog, which is more designed to document my creative life. Life is just too busy stirring the creative pot and I am doing nothing creative (though I do plan to get some writing done). Just tanking up on the sun and spending precious moments with my dad....