The Bear Affair

About six years ago I went through a phase where I occasionally bought myself stuffed animals. There was a teddy bear from Tchibo, who was so cute I couldn't resist. A stuffed jelly fish from the Monterey Bay Aqaurium. A hot pink handmade bear from the Rixdorf Christmas market. A stuffed Rhino with a red bow tie from Karstadt.....

Now there is absolutely nothing wrong with adults having stuffed animals, but for me and the cool, urban girl image I was cultivating, it was kind of embarassing. At some point each of the stuffed animals got packed away in a bag at the back of my closet. And there they stayed until my first daughter was born.




Of course, Mia was too small for stuffed animals at first (she'll be two in April). But now she loves them. Recently she went through a stage where she especially loved the hot pink handmade bear and would carry him every where with her, maybe because he matched her snow suit perfectly.

Even though she loved him so much, he also seemed to fill her with a lot of anxiety.
She would cry and say "Bear, bear, bear!" even when he was laying right in front of her.

Anyway, after a while the bear started having problems. For one thing, his head started to get loose.
I had to sew it back on once or twice. Then one of his eyes was missing. Mia woke up with him in her arms and immediately noticed the gaping hole on his head. It worried her. "Don't worry. Mama will fix it." I told her.

But I never got a chance. The next day bear simply vanished into thin air. I suppose we might have left him somewhere, but I don't remember taking him out of the house after he lost the eye. My husband and I decided the teddy bear mafia must have gotten him. The poor thing always did have those gambling problems....

This afternoon Baby Li and I posed for pictures with his eye, which I found this morning in Mia's bed.
Little hot pink bear, wherever you are, be at peace.....